Retrograde
by LolaX
Summary: An FBI student commits suicide, an investigation begins. Mulder & Scully are assigned to the case, but there is more to it than there seems and what they discover will affect their own lives. Reviews very helpful atm!
1. Chapter 1

Retrograde

(Future chapters feature extracts of Scully's journal from the episode 'Momento Mori')

**THIS IS JUST A TASTER. PLEASE REVIEW IF YOU LIKE IT AND MORE WILL FOLLOW! xxx**

Chapter One 

FBI academy, Quantico, VA 

Monday 18th October

7.30am

The new pistol felt strangely heavy in its holster on the walk from the gun store to the firing range. The frost, which had settled during the night, was beginning to melt in the weak sunlight causing the grass and paths to gleam. The Academy had just received a new batch of approved weapons and was eager to let the trainee agents warm them up. Emma Gooding felt the pistol against her side as she and her fellow trainees walked the path at the edge of the assault course. At Emma's shoulder walked her friend and roommate Delia Ambrose and behind them trudged Tom Dexter who was yawning widely. Like Emma, Tom Dexter had recently come in the top quarter of the class, in all areas of training at the academy and with graduation looming within the next year, competition was fierce to be the top graduate.

Through the thin trees at the edge of the woodland Emma could make out the familiar, supposedly motivational, signs nailed to a tree at the beginning of the course. _Pain. Hurt. Agony. Love it!_

"Don't you just hate those signs?" Emma asked, although it came out as more of a statement than a question. Delia snorted and pulled at the toggles on the front of her sweatshirt. "It's too cold this morning! I wish we were in the lab instead."

"I don't mind the cold." Tom said curtly from behind them. "But I sure am too tired to want to do this damn shooting today." Emma laughed and gestured to their guns. "The noise of all these brand new babies will wake you up, sleepyhead."

The fifteen trainees lined up at the bases and faced their instructor, SA Ed Peterson, who gave them their instructions. They were each to fire in turn, aiming for a hit in the torso of the human-shaped boards, which were their targets. Then they would have to fire in synchronisation when the order to fire was given and must hit only a limb. When Peterson had finished the briefing, the trainees pulled their protective glasses down over their eyes and snapped their ear protectors down over their baseball caps. The ear protectors would dampen the sharp sound of the gunfire but would still allow the young agents to hear orders from Peterson. "First agent, ready and fire." Peterson ordered and the line commenced firing, one after another. Emma levelled her gun as the agent two places before her fired his shot into the torso of the target, several inches below the neck. Emma's shot hit the target squarely in the chest and she smiled to herself, delighted with her shot from an unfamiliar gun. Delia's shot however was not so clear, as she was unprepared for the recoil of the new pistol, and the bullet tore a hole in the shoulder of the target. Tom Dexter cruelly snorted with laughter and fired his shot straight into the head of the target, smiling all the while. "Dexter, I said torso!" barked Peterson. "You'd better have been aiming for the head, show-off! Limbs next!" The trainees cocked their pistols and prepared themselves for the shot. "Ready." Peterson began, "Aim. Fire!" The cacophony of the guns exploded through the air and fourteen of the fifteen shots hit the targets' limbs. The bullet, which had not been fired, was still in its gun and that gun belonged to Tom Dexter.

"Dexter," called Peterson, "did you not hear the order? Dexter?" He did not answer but had his eyes fixed on his target, his gun aimed, ready to fire. Peterson was becoming impatient. "Agent Dexter, lower your weapon. You have twice failed to follow my orders on this firing range, so lower your weapon." Dexter remained motionless. "Failure to follow my order will result in your immediate removal from this facility!" threatened Peterson, whose brow was now furrowed. "Lower your weapon, put on the safety and turn." With his gun still levelled, Dexter turned slowly to face Peterson, his index finger moving not to the safety but to the trigger. Peterson raised his own weapon to take Dexter down but before he could fire, Dexter had placed the gun to his own chin and pulled the trigger.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Chapter Two

FBI Headquarters, J.Edgar Hoover Building, Washington DC 

Monday 18th October

9.15am 

In a cluttered basement office the ageing fax machine whirred into life. An untouched cup of coffee stood on the desk amid a pile of loose documents and a packet of sunflower seeds, the contents of which had spewed out across the desk. AD Walter Skinner's special agents had been urgently called to the conference room. The news of Tom Dexter's suicide had travelled fast and the FBI was concerned about why one of their best trainees had shot himself, and they were desperate to prevent a media hurricane.

"No motive is known." Skinner informed the group of federal agents. "All we know of his mental state this morning was that he complained of being too tired for shooting practice." He picked up a folder of documents from the desk and held it out to a female agent. "Agent Scully, these are Dexter's records. You and Agent Mulder need to be in Quantico before 1.30pm for the autopsy. I've organised it and had the preparations made. Let me know what you find by tomorrow at the latest." Dana Scully took the folder from her superior and stood up to leave, picking up her jacket from the back of her chair. "My report will be here by this evening."

Fox Mulder was leaning nonchalantly against the wall by the door. He looked at Scully, then back at AD Skinner. "Let's get this show on the road." He said, before following Scully from the room.

Back in the office, Mulder pulled the fax from the tray of the machine and began to read. Scully was busy collecting the equipment they needed to take with them to Quantico. "Mulder, do you have to leave your seeds everywhere? They're all over the desk." It was clear that Mulder wasn't listening. He had sat down at the desk and was still reading the fax "Mulder?" He looked up at her with an expression she couldn't quite make out. It was a mixture of happiness and revulsion, if that was possible. He cleared his throat. "It's from the NYPD. They say that Robert King has been found dead in his cell. The warden found him this morning." Scully stared at him and he could see that her mind was replaying the case that had ended in King's arrest a few months ago.

"I presume they think his death was due to an overdose?" Scully asked perceptively. Mulder nodded and handed her the fax. King had been responsible for a record shipment of cocaine which had been discovered destined for New York, and many other drug crimes in the city stretching back over a decade. The fax asked if Scully, accompanied by Mulder, was available to carry out the autopsy.

"Pass me the phone, Mulder." He put the phone down in front of her on top of a pile of documents. Scully picked up the receiver and held it between her ear and shoulder as she dialled the number given on the fax. Mulder stood up and began searching the office for the documents on King.

"NYPD homicide," a female voice on the phone said. "How may I direct your call?"

"Detective Jack Wilson, please." Scully leaned over the desk and grabbed a pen and note pad, shaking sunflower seeds off of it. "Jack, it's Dana Scully. I can't do the autopsy today because I've already got one at 1.30… Yeah that's right. I can make it there on Wednesday, if you keep the body in cold storage... It's already at the morgue? Okay… I won't be at the office for a few days." She scribbled down some details. "Yes, that's right. You can reach me on my cell, or you can call Agent Mulder… Okay, bye." She put down the receiver, tore the page from the note pad, folded it up and placed it into her jacket pocket along with her badge, and picked up her ever-ready duffel bag and the case of equipment.

"Ready to go?" Mulder asked, hoisting the strap of his holdall onto his shoulder, and picking up the heavy box of notes, full of folders on King and the new folder on Dexter.

"Yes. This is going to be a busy week." Scully checked her watch, locked the office door and they made their way down to their car.

On the road down to Quantico rain began to lash at the windscreen making the relatively short journey much slower than normal. Mulder drove, as usual, while Scully was busy reading the file on Dexter. She could see no evidence to suggest a motive for suicide. He seemed like a well-rounded student who clearly wanted to succeed at the Bureau. Dexter certainly wasn't an average suicide case; nothing in the file showed him to be depressed or on drugs or any other of the usual symptoms of the suicidal.

"So, what do you expect to find?" Mulder asked, over the din of the pouring rain. "Anything strange?"

"I don't know. His file shows no cause for suicide, but we might find the cause in his body. It could be drugs, even if the file says he wasn't an addict, but I don't think so. You know the drug tests they have at the academy, nothing gets past them. It says here that his only family members are his mother and sister. They live in upstate New York. We'll need to visit them soon." The Virginia countryside flowed past the car windows in a blur of rain and grey skies as they travelled south towards the academy. Soon the weather began to clear and Scully was able to recognise the woodland through which they drove. "We need to stop for some gas." Mulder announced. "There's a gas station just up ahead." They drove on into Triangle and soon reached a small gas station with two pumps and a pokey, little store. It had stopped raining so Mulder happily got out of the car to fill up while Scully went to the bathroom.

As she passed the store to the bathroom around the side, Scully noticed the ads up in the window. Amongst the usual ancient pick-up truck and fishing equipment for sale she noticed a poster for what looked like a local book group or Christian society. However upon closer inspection it was asking for new members to join the Virginia branch of MUFON. Scully frowned but carried on to the bathroom; she and Mulder were very familiar with the activities of the Mutual UFO Network.

Back in the car Mulder offered Scully some sunflower seeds from a bag he had bought in the store. Predictably, she declined. As they drove on into Quantico, Mulder moaned that the price of gas had gone up, but Scully wasn't really listening. She was mentally preparing for the autopsy she would soon have to carry out. She had done many procedures on suicide victims but those who had shot themselves at close range were always the most unpleasant. She took steady breaths and remembered back to her time at med school. Before she noticed where they were, Mulder had pulled up at the gate to the academy, shown the guard his badge and was now pulling into the main car park. They had arrived an hour early, but no one would mind.

The agents pinned on their FBI identity badges, and approached the front desk.

"Agents Mulder and Scully." Scully announced. "Here for the autopsy of Tom Dexter." They handed their badges and guns to the FBI agent who checked that all was in order.

"Dexter's been put out in autopsy suite 3. That's in the basement." He handed them back their id and weapons and they began to lug all of the equipment down to the morgue and autopsy room in the basement.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

FBI Academy, Quantico, VA

Monday 18th October

12.36pm

As the agent at the desk had said, the body bag containing Tom Dexter had been laid out in the autopsy suite. Scully put on her medical overalls, surgical mask, glasses and gloves. All Mulder had done was to take off his jacket and roll up his sleeves. Scully threw him a pair of latex gloves and he put them on reluctantly.

"I don't really want to get all yucky." Mulder said, his nose wrinkled as Scully began to unwrap the corpse.

As the bag was unzipped the smell of blood and butchery wafted into the room. It mingled with the already pungent smell of disinfectant to create an offensive smell, but one that Mulder and Scully were well used to. When the body was fully removed from its wrapping, what lay on the autopsy table was a man whose body looked almost untouched by death, however above the shoulders, in the place where the head should be, was nothing but a mass of bloody tissue. The self-inflicted shot, which had torn through his chin, soft pallet and cranium, had also ripped his skull from the top of his spinal column. Scully gasped as she peered at the foul mess which was Tom Dexter's head. "You ever seen one this violent?" Mulder asked bending for a closer look at the corpse.

"Never." Scully answered breathless. "Did they retrieve the bullet and weapon?"

Mulder looked through a tray on a table behind him. "Yeah. Here's the gun. New FBI issue. Glock semi-automatic. Hell of a kick to the shot." Scully looked up at him.

"I can see that by the damage it's done. What about the bullet?" She picked up a scalpel and tweezers and began to pluck at some of the flesh.

"It says here, in the preliminary report, that the bullet is presumed to still be inside the victim."

Scully scoffed. "That's impossible! It has torn this man's head apart and turned the tissue into an unrecognisable mass. It must have emerged from the top or back of the skull to do this amount of damage. You just told me how powerful that weapon is!" Mulder stared at her and said crossly

"Hey, don't shoot the messenger! No pun intended!"

Scully sighed and said, "First things first. We need to record and weigh all the organs to check their health. Then we _need_ to find that bullet, whether its in here somewhere or still out on the firing range. I can't believe the negligence…Who carried out the preliminary?"

Mulder looked back at the report, "Dr David Carlton."

"Carlton?" Scully thought. "I know him, Mulder. He's an oncologist at Holy Cross. He went through my x-rays! Why did they call _him_?"

"I'll find out." Mulder said and pulled off his rubber gloves with a snap. "You can manage on your own, right?"

Scully nodded. "I'll be back soon, Scully." He grabbed his jacket and cell phone and left the room.

When Mulder returned, Scully had weighed and catalogued all the organs possible except the brain and liver, and was speaking into a small black Dictaphone.

"Not a large enough volume of the brain left intact to record. Bullet is not present in cranial mass." She clicked the stop button on the machine as Mulder took off his jacket once more, and asked him, "What did you find out?"

"I spoke to Special Agent Stephanie Drage. She was the first qualified agent on the scene, except for Ed Peterson, and she said the reason that Dr Carlton was called is because he was the nearest. Apparently they called the hospital, who said that Carlton was visiting a cancer patient nearby and could get here fastest and carry out the preliminary. The patient lives in Triangle, so he was here in minutes."

Scully was satisfied with the explanation, but couldn't believe the experienced physician could presume the bullet had remained in the body.

"We'll need to speak to Carlton," Scully said. "And to his patient, and to Dexter's mother and sister, of course. But first we need to finish up here."

"What have you got left to do?" Mulder asked putting on another pair of latex gloves.

"I've still got to remove the liver. We need to do a tox-screen, but only for abnormal toxins." Scully flicked the scalpel inside the torso a few times and soon the liver was ready to be lifted out.

"Hand me that dish, Mulder."

She gestured to a large silver organ basin on the table behind Mulder. He held it out to her.

"Would you like fava beans with that? Or how about a nice Chianti?" He grinned.

Scully took the bowl from him. "That's a really tasteless joke for this moment in time, Mulder."

"Sorry." He mumbled looking at his shoes.

While waiting for the tox-screen to come back, the agents cleared up the autopsy suite.

"Boy am I glad I don't do this all the time." Mulder said wiping his brow with his forearm as he helped Scully to clear up. "How long did they say the tox-screen will be?"

"They're gonna call any minute now." Scully glanced at the clock on the wall. "Fill this out." She handed him a folder and Mulder sighed. He signed his name in the supervisory box of the form and wrote the date. Just then Scully's cell phone rang. It was the results.

"Well, the report shows no abnormal toxins. Just the normal trace levels of bile and lipases." She said as she replaced the phone into her pocket.

The agents left the autopsy suite and entered the locker room. Scully began removing her scrubs and white coat, and Mulder pulled out his own cell phone.

"It's SA Fox Mulder. I need the address of a Mrs Joanne Ford. Yeah, uh, somewhere in Triangle, Virginia. Now, please. Thanks, call me back." He turned to Scully who was just sorting out her hair. "Let's get up to the firing range and see if we can find something. We'll have Joanne Ford's address soon."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Hogan's alley and firing range, FBI academy,

Quantico, VA

Monday 18th October

1.48pm

The agents walked up the hill towards the firing range. The rain had cleared for a moment and the weather had become milder. As they passed the trees at the start of the assault course, Mulder sighed. "I remember this." He gestured towards the climbing ropes. "Getting up early so I could be first round the course and then first in for breakfast."

Scully pointed at signs on the nearby tree. "Remember those signs? I hate them!"

Mulder sniggered at her.

As they ducked under the police tape and onto the concrete of the firing range, flashing their badges to the guard, raindrops began to fall from the sky once more. They hit the concrete making large polka dots all over the ground. Mulder reached into his pocket and pulled out his compact umbrella. He held it over the both of them as they began to check for signs of the bullet.

"The report said that Dexter was in bay 15." Scully said to Mulder, her voice raised to carry over the splash of the rain. They walked to the fifteenth bay and began to scour the ground. Mulder handed Scully the umbrella and dashed over to the targets. He checked for the bullet, all the while getting wetter and wetter.

"Mulder! Get back under the umbrella!" Scully yelled. "You're gonna be soaked!"

"I already am!" He grinned and turned back to the targets as rainwater surged down a gutter past his feet. Mulder looked down and noticed something glinting in the water. "Scully!" He called crouching down to peer into the leaf-cluttered drain. The patter of wet footsteps approached and Scully was next to him. "What is it Mulder?"

"There is something in the gutter. You got any gloves with you?"

"Yeah." Scully reached into her pocket, pulled out some latex gloves and handed them to him. Mulder pulled them onto his cold and wet hands with difficulty. He reached down into the water and attempted to grab the glistening object from amongst all the leaves and other debris. He pulled it out and held it up. It was a bullet, but was it the one they were looking for? His hand and the bullet were covered in some sort of sticky residue, similar to wallpaper paste.

"We need to get this matched to the gun." He said, standing up. "I'm hoping this is Dexter's bullet, but out here it could just be any old one. And what is this sticky stuff?" He held the bullet up to his nose and sniffed the goo. It smelled metallic. Mulder told Scully to smell it. She inhaled, wrinkled her nose and said, "Smells like… like iron, blood almost." Mulder nodded and placed the bullet into an evidence bag Scully had handed him. He sealed it up and placed it in his pocket. The agents turned to leave. Suddenly, Scully froze. Mulder looked at her puzzled.

"What is it Scully?"

She moved her eyes towards the woodland and lowered her voice. "Someone was watching us. From amongst the trees." Mulder turned towards where she was looking. Nothing. Just some bushes rustling in the breeze and rain swirling around the trees. "Scully," he began "there's nothing there…"

But Scully whirled around and pointed, "There!" she yelled. Mulder turned and ran, following the quickly retreating person into the trees. Scully ran after him, but lost sight of him as he tore away amongst the undergrowth.

Mulder chased the person through the bushes, the branches clawing at his clothes and face. He slipped and skidded on the rain-soaked undergrowth until he came into a clearing and stopped. The person had vanished. Mulder drew his gun and stared around the woodland, listening; his breath heaving in his chest, his heart racing with adrenaline. Above the roaring of the rainfall in his ears he was able to make out the sound of a twig snapping somewhere to his right. He plunged through a large bush and ducked a huge tree branch, continuing his pursuit. He could see the person now; a man wearing a thick navy blue coat and a cream baseball cap. A branch whipped past Mulder's face, cutting him deeply just below his right eye.

"Jesus!" He yelled, putting his hand to the cut, but still running at full speed after the man. "Freeze! Federal Agent!" Mulder yelled his breath getting shorter. "Stop or I'll fire!" The man stopped and stood still facing the opposite direction. Mulder approached him, gun drawn. "Now put your hands up and turn around so I can see you."

The man turned around and Mulder was taken aback to see the FBI Academy logo printed on the front of the man's jacket and on his baseball cap. The rain seemed to have eased, but it was only due to the obstruction of the trees above them. "Who are you?" Mulder asked the man. "Why were you at the firing range, and why did you run?" Suddenly, Scully appeared next to Mulder, from amongst the trees. She was panting and her usually pale face was red.

"My name is Patrick Lennox." The man stammered. "I'm a trainee here. I knew Tom Dexter." Mulder relaxed his gun, and replaced it in its holster. "Well, Mr Lennox, have you spoken to the police? Because I don't recall our case file having a record of you." Mulder looked at Scully who was still catching her breath. "Are you alright, Scully?"

She sighed and took a deep breath. "Yeah, I'm …I'm fine, Mulder. What… h-happened to your cheek?"

"Just a scratch from a branch." He gave her a reassuring smile and approached Lennox.

"Mr Lennox, I'm afraid we will need to ask you a few questions. Come down to the academy and we can take a statement from you." Mulder showed Patrick Lennox his Id badge. "Will you come with us? We need your statement to help us figure out why Dexter committed suicide." Lennox nodded and followed Mulder and Scully back out of the woodland and back down the path to the academy.

The agents were provided with an interview room in which they sat down with Lennox and a tape recorder. Just as he sat down, Mulder's cell phone rang. "I've gotta take this," he told Scully. "It's about the address. I'll be back in ten." He left the room.

"Mr Patrick Lennox, trainee at the FBI academy, Quantico." Scully said into the microphone. "Interview commenced Monday 18th October, 2.36pm."

"Well, all he seems to know are facts we _already_ know." Scully explained to Mulder after she had terminated the interview and they had released Lennox back into the real world. "He just says that Dexter was tired. He didn't know anything about drugs or depression, so his story checks out."

Mulder nodded and said, "Anything else?"

Scully's face became troubled. "He said that he was Tom Dexter's roommate until last month." Mulder's brow creased as he frowned. Scully continued, "He says that he got transferred to another room because he was being kept awake by Dexter. Apparently he used to talk in his sleep while he was dreaming; scream sometimes." Mulder's frown increased further and he asked,

"What did he scream about?"

Scully leaned in conspiratorially, her voice calm and low. "Well you won't believe this..."

Mulder looked deep into her eyes, urging her to continue. "…alien abduction." She breathed and added, "Keep that under your hat, Mulder."

"But I'm not wearing a hat, Scully."

Scully went to fax the autopsy report to Skinner, along with a brief explanation about Lennox. She also sent the bullet down to the forensics and ballistics lab. They would contact her when a matching weapon had been determined and the sticky substance identified.

When she returned to the car park, she found Mulder sat in the driver's seat reading a map.

"I've found Joanne Ford's address." He said triumphantly. "It will take us about ten minutes to get there."


	5. Chapter 5

_(Author's note: Hi everyone! Sorry about this very short chapter. It's really just to move the story along. I'm busy at University this week, so updates may be slow! Please R&R! All feedback is greatly appreciated.)_

Chapter Five

Joanne Ford's residence,

1475 Fuller Heights Rd, Triangle, VA.

Monday 18th October 

4.27pm

The Ford Taurus pulled up on the short drive of Joanne Ford's small single-storey house. The house had woodland to the rear and was on a large yet quiet road, which was surrounded by tall, skeletal trees. It reminded Mulder of many other houses he had visited in the past. As the agents approached the porch, Mulder noticed a sticker in the window next to the front door. "Scully." He pointed to the window sticker. Scully looked where he pointed and her eyes widened. It was a MUFON sticker. "Another one, that's a strange coincidence." She muttered.

"What?" Mulder asked. Scully explained about the poster she had seen in the window of the gas station earlier that day. Mulder shrugged his shoulders and said, "I guess they're looking for more believers."

He pressed the doorbell button and a shrill rendition of Elvis Presley's "Love me tender" could be heard. Scully raised her eyebrow and Mulder let out a snort of laughter.

"I've got to get me one of those!" Mulder exclaimed in delight as the door was opened. A grey-haired woman with the distinct look of illness opened the door.

"Mrs Joanne Ford?" Scully asked, "Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully. Can we ask you a few questions?"

They both held up their badges for her to see. "Yes, of course." She answered intrigued, standing back to let them pass. "Please come in." As they walked through the house, Scully noticed all the photographs on the walls. They were obviously all of Mrs Ford's family. A picture of a blond young man in a rainbow-coloured frame caught her eye. She was saddened at the amount of people here who would be distressed by the onset of Mrs Ford's cancer and immediately thought back to her own family's grief.

They sat in the small lounge and Scully began to question the woman. "We are investigating the death of one of the FBI's trainees at Quantico. Your doctor, David Carlton, is involved in the investigation and we just need to verify that he was here with you earlier today."

"Oh, yes. Dr. Carlton visits me regularly to check on my illness. I've known him for a very long time so we have become close friends. He was here early this morning, but was called away urgently."

"Yes." Mulder spoke up. "That was to carry out an urgent preliminary autopsy on the victim. Mrs Ford, are you a member of MUFON?" Scully glared at Mulder.

"Yes." Mrs Ford said. "I had a friend who was a member and she asked me to join."

"Well we have had many dealings with MUFON over the years." Mulder said. Scully raised her eyebrow, urging him to steer the questions back to Carlton, but Mulder continued.

"This friend of yours," he asked, "she doesn't suffer from cancer too, does she?"

Joanne Ford looked surprised and nodded. "Yes, I met Betsy at the hospital when I had my treatment. She sadly passed away last year."

Scully had grown interested now, but also frightened. She leant forward and spoke sensitively to the woman, a slight waver in her voice.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Mrs Ford, do you mind me asking what type of cancer you are suffering from?"

Joanne did not mind and answered, "It's my brain; near my sinuses. They say it's inoperable but can be treated with chemo. But I'm not sure there is any hope for me; there wasn't for Betsy."

Scully suddenly stood up and turned to leave. "Thank you Mrs Ford." She left the house quickly.

Mulder stood up too and shook Joanne's hand, adding, "That is very helpful, Mrs Ford. We may contact you again if something else comes to light." He then followed Scully back to the car.

"Scully?" She had been quiet for a while as they drove back towards Washington, and Mulder was concerned. He looked over at her in the passenger seat. "Are you okay?" She nodded and replied,

"I just thought all this MUFON stuff was long over." She sighed and caught his eye. "This is already a complicated case, Mulder, and now it's getting personal. I thought I could move on from my cancer, but it keeps following me. I can't seem to leave it behind."

She leant back in her seat as Mulder stopped at a traffic light. He leant over and squeezed her hand in consolation, but he didn't say anything; he didn't know what to say.


	6. Chapter 6

_(Author's Note: Hi again everyone! Thank you for your reviews you lovely people! This is gonna be my last update for a week or so because I'm busy at Uni! Please keep up the R&R as it is greatly appreciated! Love you all and hope you enjoy this chapter!)_

Chapter Six

Holy Cross Memorial Hospital,

Washington DC

Monday 18th October 

6.00pm

Mulder pushed through the main door to the hospital, holding it open for Scully who trailed behind him. She seemed apprehensive and Mulder gave her a reassuring smile, but she didn't see it. Scully led the way down the corridor towards the reception desk, both agents fishing their badges from their pockets as they walked.

The receptionist paged Dr Carlton. Mulder and Scully waited, slightly impatiently, for the doctor to arrive. He was certainly taking his time. Mulder tapped his foot and checked his watch every few seconds. Scully just stood staring around, taking in the surroundings and remembering her time here as a patient. After what seemed like hours waiting, Carlton had still not appeared. Scully was about to have words with the receptionist, but she had just answered the phone.

"Okay, Dr Carlton. I'll let them know right away." She looked over at the two agents. "Dr Carlton is very busy at the moment. One of his patients has just gone into cardiac arrest while in radiotherapy." Scully was shocked, but the woman continued regardless. "He would like you to wait in his office. It's more comfortable and he will be there as soon as he can." She pointed to the elevator. "His office is on the third floor, room 304."

The door to the office was unlocked and the agents walked inside. Scully immediately flopped down into the chair by the desk. Mulder crossed the room, his investigative nature getting the better of him, and he began to riffle through the papers on Carlton's desk.

"Mulder," Scully said warningly, "He may be back here any minute. He won't be pleased if he sees you going through his papers." Mulder just shrugged and continued invading the doctor's privacy.

"He had an emergency to attend to, Scully. He'll be a while."

Scully sighed again and closed her eyes tight. She could feel a headache coming on. Mulder, who had found nothing of interest amongst the papers, was now looking at the books neatly arranged on the shelves behind the desk. He found a section full of books written by Carlton himself. A thick blue and grey spine caught Mulder's eye. He pulled out the book and sat down in a chair next to Scully.

"What you reading?" Scully asked, now pinching the bridge of her nose to try and alleviate her worsening migraine**.**

"I thought this, written by Dr Carlton himself, would make interesting reading." He said slightly sarcastically and held up the book for her to see.

Scully opened her eyes, squinting in the artificial light, and read the title on the cover of the thick medical tome; _'Classification of Nasopharyngeal carcinoma and its related__ metastasis__.'_

Scully's gaze dropped slightly, and Mulder understood. She was upset about her cancer again. He held the book out to her. She shook her head. "I don't want to read it, Mulder." She said sadly. "I don't need to read about that. I know exactly how it feels." Mulder nodded and opened the book himself. He looked through the contents page and flicked to the chapter titled, _'Known causes of Nasopharyngeal carcinoma'. _He began to read in silence.

Scully's cell phone rang from her pocket. Mulder looked up from the book as she answered.

"Scully…Yes, hold on a second." She placed the phone on the desk, grabbed a notepad and pen from her pocket, before putting the phone between her ear and shoulder. "Yes, go ahead." She listened and scribbled words onto the paper as Mulder watched her. He smiled as her eyebrow raised in that oh so familiar way. Sceptical Scully was back to normal, her job once again distracting her from her own life and her headache.

"I understand. Did you also run tests on the concentrations of lymphocyte and protein? Could I have those results too?" She scribbled quickly, underlining an important word heavily. "Thanks." She hung up and looked at Mulder. "Well that was exciting!"

"What did they find? Was it Dexter's bullet? What was that goo?"

"The bullet _was_ positively id'ed as from Dexter's gun. That _goo_," Scully said, "was cerebrospinal fluid." Mulder looked at her and said incredulously,

"Surely it shouldn't be that thick? I thought cerebrospinal fluid was liquid, like tears or saliva or something."

Scully nodded. "It is."

"This stuff was like…wallpaper paste!"

"The tests showed that it contained Beta-2 transferrin." Mulder just looked at her blankly; she continued. "Beta-2 transferrin is a specific indicator of cerebrospinal fluid because it is not found in any other bodily fluid. The fluid also showed hugely increased concentrations of lymphocyte and protein. That's why it was so thick. In humans, that sort of increase would be caused by severe viral or fungal meningitis, but there was no evidence, not even trace evidence, of any type of infection."

"So what are you saying, Scully?" Mulder asked, his interest fully held, his mind working through the details.

"What I'm saying Mulder, is that this _goo_, this cerebrospinal fluid, must have mutated. It's not human…"

The door opened with a loud click and in walked Dr Carlton, a white coat over his smart dark grey suit.

"I'm so sorry to have kept you waiting but I had a genuine emergency. Today has been such a strange and busy day." He took off his white coat and sat down at his desk, facing the two agents. "So how can I be of assistance, Agent Scully and…"

"Mulder." Mulder said, taking in the thin grey-haired man sat before him. Dr Carlton noticed the book in Mulder's hands.

"Are you interested in _Nasopharyngeal carcinoma, _Agent Mulder?"

Mulder did not reply, but placed the book down on the desk and glanced at Scully. The look they exchanged was so small that no one but each other would have noticed it.

Carlton turned to Scully. "How are you Dana?" His eyes showed his true concern.

"I'm very well, Dr Carlton, but I would appreciate it if you treated me as an FBI agent and not a former patient. We need to keep this strictly professional." Scully said authoritatively.

"Of course." Dr Carlton accepted, "Now I presume you are here about the suicide of Tom Dexter?"

"Yes, we need to know the details about your preliminary."

"What would you like to know?"

"Well," Scully asked, "we want to know why you were able to presume the bullet was still in the cranial mass? I mean, I carried out the comprehensive autopsy myself and there was no way that the bullet would have remained in there. You seemed to simply presume it was still present, but not look for it, and then not advise a search of the crime scene for the bullet. This can be seen as negligence, Dr Carlton."

"I don't know what to tell you." The doctor rubbed his stubbly chin thoughtfully. "I simply decided that the bullet must be embedded inside the victim's cranium because he had shot himself at such close range."

"There _was_ no cranium!" Scully was getting angry now. "There was simply cranial _mass_. The bullet had torn the man's tissue to shreds. There was nowhere _for_ the bullet to embed itself!"

"I was told that I was only to carry out a preliminary report, Agent Scully. Unlike you, I am not a forensic pathologist. I am an oncology consultant who happens to be a medical examiner. I am not really familiar with homicides and firearms!" He was getting annoyed and seemed to be insulted by the allegations of negligence. "I was called in because I was the closest outside medical professional available." He stood up from his desk and said curtly, "Now if there is nothing else I must return to my patients. You can call me if you need anything else, but I will not discuss _this_ matter any further." Picking up his white coat, he left the office, the door closing behind him with a slight, yet noticeable slam of annoyance.

Scully's eyebrows were raised and Mulder just exhaled loudly. "Think he's up to something?"

"Seems suspicious." Scully agreed, just as the door re-opened and a nurse entered.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise you were in here." She turned to leave.

"Wait." Mulder said, standing up. "Do you know Dr Carlton?" The nurse stopped in the doorway and answered. "Yes. My name is Claire Stone. I'm head oncology nurse. I work with Dr Carlton in radiotherapy and radiography; I have done for about a year."

"Would you be able to take us down to radiography?" Mulder showed her his badge.

"Yes, I suppose so. I don't think that anyone is scheduled in there at the moment." She led them from the room and into an elevator. "I'll get you both clearance passes and show you where the radiography suite for oncology is, but then I must return to my patient. He's recovering from a recent cardiac arrest."

Scully spoke up, "Miss Stone, can I ask you something in confidence?"

"Of course Agent Scully." Claire nodded and smiled at Scully.

"I suffered from brain cancer a few years ago and Dr Carlton was my specialist. I was wondering if you and he receive many patients with Nasopharyngeal carcinoma?"

"Yes." Nurse Stone nodded gravely. "Over the past eighteen months there has been an increase in the number of patients with Nasopharyngeal carcinoma. Patients are being referred to us from all over the country. We have become a specialist centre of sorts. Well, here we are." She indicated the radiography suite to them and went over to a desk nearby, picking up two clearance badges. She signed them both and handed them to the agents. "Take as much time as you need. We have no more x-rays scheduled for tonight. You can call me if I can help you with anything else." She smiled and walked away, re-entering the elevator, leaving the agents in the corridor.

Scully looked at Mulder. He had the expression on his face that showed his brain was trying to put the pieces of evidence together. Then he suddenly walked over to a notice board on the other side of the corridor in a waiting area and ripped a poster from it. It was the MUFON poster again. Scully took it from him, folded it up and placed it in her pocket saying, "That's spooky." She suppressed a shudder.  
"That's my name, isn't it?" Mulder winked at her before pushing through the door to the x-ray room.

Scully immediately began to search the room for anything strange, going over to the light boxes around the corner. Mulder went over to the x-ray machine itself and a nearby computer. He moved the mouse and the screen brightened revealing a password protect screen. Mulder sat down at the computer.

"Scully, guess what the password would be." He called, looking around. "Scully?"

No answer. Mulder called again. "Scully?"

"Mulder come look at this!" She called, urgency evident in her voice. He walked around the corner to where she stood at a light box on the wall.

"What?" He asked standing next to her. In her hands Scully held two x-rays.

"Take a look at this." She clipped them onto the light box and switched it on. An image of a spinal cord and a skull showed up. "Here." She pointed to the edges of the vertebrae and the inside edges of the skull. "A thickening of the cerebrospinal fluid. Just look at it Mulder!" Then she pointed to the centre of the skull at a small white shape; a nasopharyngeal tumour.

"Who's x-rays are these?" He asked, his gaze now on her, not the images. Her eyes found his and when she spoke her voice was low. "A patient called Diego Martín."

The agents raced from the radiography suite, out into the reception area and up the stairs. Mulder took the stairs three at a time and burst into the oncology wards, Scully chasing behind. Mulder spotted Nurse Claire Stone at the end of the corridor and called, "Miss Stone!" She turned as he ran up to her. "We need to see Diego Martín, urgently."

"Oh…yes. Alright." She said, slightly flustered. "His room is right this way. What is this about?"

"We have reason to believe he may attempt to kill himself or someone else." Scully said, catching up with them.

In bed, in his private room, lay Diego Martín. He was a skinny, Hispanic man; 40 years old, with closely cropped black hair and tattoos covering both of his arms. He was fast asleep and hooked up to an IV.

"I'm sorry," Claire Stone said, "I can't wake him. He is extremely ill. He was admitted here because of a cocaine overdose. That was when we discovered his cancer and symptoms of meningitis."

Mulder and Scully assigned the hospital security to keep watch on Diego Martín, though they doubted very much a man in his condition would have the strength to kill himself or anyone else.

When they finally left the hospital, the sun had set and the fluorescent orange streetlights were ablaze along the highway under the star-dotted sky. Neither agent spoke as Mulder drove Scully back to her apartment in Georgetown.

As Mulder pulled the Taurus up at the kerb, Scully said, "You don't have to rush off do you?"  
Mulder shook his head, looking at her. Were those tears he could see in the corners of her eyes, or was he imagining it in the evening light? Scully brushed at her eyes and continued, "Good. Come up. I have something important that I want to show you."

_(2nd Author's note: Well now you, and Mulder, will both have to be patient and wait to see what Scully's important something is! :) Hmmm?)_


	7. Chapter 7

**_(Author's note: Well I have been SO busy this week, so it's amazing I managed to finish this chapter :)  
_****_Might not be the best; it is just helping to establish the relationship between M & S a little, and push the plot on so we can get to more action, but please R&R anyway! Hope you all like it…  
_**_**This chapter contains large extracts of Scully's journal from the episode 'Momento Mori'. They do not belong to me, but I use them with the greatest respect to the writers Chris Carter, Vince Gilligan, John Shiban and Frank Spotnitz.)**_

Chapter Seven

Dana Scully's apartment,

Georgetown, Washington DC

Monday 18th October

8.45pm

After unlocking the front door, Scully crossed the room to the shelf above her desk and pulled out a small black notebook. She sat down in her desk chair and swivelled round to face Mulder who was still stood in the doorway. "Remember this?" She held up the book. Mulder nodded; it was the journal Scully had kept during the time of her cancer. She had written candidly to Mulder, but hadn't wanted him to read it. After he told her he had read a page, she had told him she'd thrown it out.

"I thought you threw it out." He said softly, crossing the room towards her, taking off his jacket. "You didn't want me to read it before, what good is it going to do now? D'you think it's gonna help these people?"

Scully sighed and said, "I had the same form of cancer, Mulder. I know exactly how it feels. I can understand their frustration; knowing that there is nothing you can do." Her voice began to crack. "All you can do is hope, and even that is a struggle. I was lucky." She paused and focused her gaze on Mulder. "I still had faith. A faith both shaken and strengthened by your convictions."

She looked back down at the book in her hand, cleared her throat, before holding it out to Mulder. "I'm glad I decided not to throw it out. I'm ready for you to read it now."

Mulder threw his jacket into an armchair and gently took the book from her and sat down on the brown leather couch. He opened the book to see Scully's familiarly swirly handwriting filling the pages. He looked up from the pages but could not catch her gaze as she had turned away from him. He lowered his eyes to the words which had been kept secret for so long and began to read.

_'I feel time like a heartbeat, the seconds pumping in my breast like a reckoning. The luminous mysteries that once seemed so distant and unreal, threatening clarity in the presence of a truth entertained not in youth, but only in its passage. I feel these words as if their meaning were weight being lifted from me, knowing that you will read them and share my burden, as I have come to trust no other. That you should know my heart, look into it, finding there the memory and experience that belong to you, that are you, is a comfort to me now as I feel the tethers loose and the prospects darken for the continuance of a journey that began not so long ago, and which began again with a faith both shaken and strengthened by your convictions, if not for which I might never have been so strong now. As I cross to face you and look at you incomplete, hoping that you will forgive me for not making the rest of the journey with you.'_

Scully had spoken those words. A faith both shaken and strengthened by your convictions. She had been kept fighting by his beliefs as well as her own. His beliefs, though they unsettled her, had changed her own and had made them even stronger. As Mulder continued to read, Scully stood up and left the room.

_'Cancer arrives in the body unannounced; a dark stranger who takes up residence, turning its new home against itself. This is the evil of cancer; that it starts as an invader but soon becomes one with the invaded, forcing you to destroy it, but only at the risk of destroying yourself... Mulder, I hope that in these terms you might know it and know me… And if the darkness should have swallowed me as you read this, you must never think there was the possibility of some secret intervention, something you might have done, and though we've travelled far together this last distance must necessarily be travelled alone...  
__I have not written to you in the last 24 hours because the treatment has weakened my spirit as well as my body. Mulder, it's difficult to describe to you the fear of facing and enemy, which I can neither conquer nor escape. Penny Northern has taken a downturn. I now look at her with a respect that can only come from one who is about to walk the same dark path... I pray that I have her courage to face this journey.'_

Just as Mulder was turning the page, Scully came back into the room, a bottle of beer in each hand. She placed them on the glass coffee table and sat down next to Mulder. "You'll recognise that part." She told him, looking down at the pages open in his lap.

'_Mulder, I feel you close though I know you are now pursuing your own path. For that I am grateful, more than I could ever express. I need to know you're out there if I am ever to see through this.'_

As Mulder read, Scully sipped at her beer and rested her head against the back of the couch. Mulder closed the book, placed it down on the coffee table and retrieved his own beer. He pulled at the knot of his tie, loosening it and then, like Scully, he leant back and they both sipped away in silence.  
After a few minutes, Mulder replaced his beer on the glass coffee table. The sharp clink of glass on glass caused Scully to come out of her reverie and she turned to look at him. Mulder smiled and reached out for her hand.  
"I'm always gonna be here Scully. I'm not going anywhere." Scully smiled her thanks and squeezed his hand.  
"I'm so glad you're with me through everything. Thank you for believing." A smile pulled at the corners of Mulder's lips as he watched her drain her bottle and stand up. "Mind if I go take a shower?" she asked.

Mulder shook his head. "You go and relax, and I'll order us some food."  
Mulder picked up the phone and called the local pizza place, a number he knew by heart, and ordered the usual.

Scully was still in the bathroom when the pizza arrived. Mulder payed the delivery boy and called towards the bathroom, "Scully, pizza!"  
He sat back down on the couch and opened the steaming box to reveal their usual; a large pizza topped with pepperoni, green peppers, mushrooms, tomatoes and extra cheese.  
"Smells good." Scully said as she emerged from the bathroom, wearing her white bathrobe over her favourite mauve silk pyjamas and towelling her hair, to find Mulder already munching on a slice.  
"And don't worry there's no chloral hydrate in here." He chuckled as she threw her towel onto an armchair, grabbed a slice and sat down beside him. Scully smiled and leaned over to kiss him in the cheek.  
"Thanks, Mulder."  
"Your welcome, Scully." He smiled and began to sing, "Shaft! Can you dig it? They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother-" "Shuff your mowff!" Scully interrupted, through a mouthful of pizza. Mulder began to laugh hard, which set Scully off too. She tried not to, but ended up spraying pizza crumbs all over the place.

After clearing up all the crumbs and putting the empty pizza box in the trash, Scully returned to the couch, where Mulder had now put his feet up and made himself comfortable. Scully sat next to him with her legs stretched out beside his and leaned her head on his shoulder. Mulder wrapped his arms around her and placed an affectionate kiss on the top of her head. They sat like that for a long while, not speaking or moving; each lost in their own thoughts.

Suddenly the phone began to ring, shattering the contented silence in the room.

"Let the machine get it." Mulder said distractedly into Scully's still damp hair. Scully just nodded her head from where it rested under his, as her answer-phone message began to play, 'Hi. This is Dana Scully. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'  
"Dana, it's mom." Margaret Scully's voice filled the apartment. Scully lunged to pick up the phone, but Mulder held her back.  
"Don't answer unless it's urgent." He whispered, and Scully relaxed back against him. He absentmindedly began to twist a gradually drying strand of her red hair between his fingers. She looked up at him and smiled as her mom's voice continued.  
"I want you to come over soon. I was thinking about how long it has been since I've seen you! Give me a call when you can because I want you to come over for dinner one weekend; this coming Saturday if you're free! I'm a bit lonely here on my own. Okay, well, bye Dana." She was about to hang up when she continued, "Oh, and by the way, you're more than welcome to bring Fox with you. That's all. Love you, Dana. Bye." The machine clicked and stopped recording as Mrs Scully hung up.  
"Mmm, home-cooked food." Mulder mused, smiling and smacking his lips. "So can I come along?"  
Scully sat up and turned, answering his question by laughing and enveloping him in a hug.

Mulder went down to the car and collected his overnight bag from the trunk. When he returned, Scully had arranged a plaid blanket and some pillows on the couch for him. "Thanks Scully." He said rooting through the bag for his pyjamas.

"You sure you're gonna be comfortable enough?" Scully asked thoughtfully.  
"Of course." Mulder answered walking to the bathroom with his pyjamas and toothbrush. "I love your couch. It's much more comfortable than mine, and that damn water bed!" Scully smiled and sat down in the armchair. Mulder returned wearing one of his many baggy grey New York Knicks T-shirts and black shorts and lay down on the couch.

"We need to be up and out by about 6am. I've set my watch alarm for 5am, so if you're not up I'll wake you." He said as he made himself comfortable on the couch, wriggling under the blanket.  
"Okay." Scully replied. She picked up the notebook from the coffee table and stood up. "Want me to tuck you in?" She smiled cheekily at him.  
"I won't say no." Mulder replied enticingly. Scully kissed him on the forehead and tucked the blanket around him, both laughing.  
"Night, Mulder."  
"Goodnight, Scully. Sweet dreams."  
Scully turned off the light and crossed to her bedroom, giving Mulder one last smile before shutting the door behind her.

_  
**Next time: Mulder and Scully meet Dexter's mother and sister, discover some more weird consequences and spend the night at a really crummy motel…**_


End file.
